Window On The World
“I am telling you the truth, Officer, I saw a woman running and screaming down the street with nothing on.” They never believe me when I call them. They think I’m nuts. Well, I’m not nuts and the woman was real.
I see the strangest things through my window. I’m lucky to have a good window. Some of my friends don’t have a window at all and some that do, can’t see anything through them. My window looks right out onto the street. The other day I saw a three legged man riding a bicycle, or was a two legged man riding a tricycle? Whichever it was it seemed odd at the time. I called the police, but they said that they really couldn’t spare an officer to investigate, but that they would cruise the neighborhood to see if they saw anything strange. When the officer was finished taking my report something must have happened in the station, because I overheard a lot of laughter on the phone. Maybe someone tripped or something.
“No, doctor, I’m not crazy. It was a woman, totally naked, running down the street, screaming.” I’m used to this. It happens every so often. Something weird happens through my window and people think I’m nuts because I report it. Most of the time they are polite and take a report and check it out. But sometimes they get upset and try to take my window away. I just remind them that I pay rent here and that they can’t just take my stuff away. I have rights, after all.
It’s been like this for the last seventeen years. Ever since I moved here. I needed a place to stay after my wife left. She was such a nag. Bitch, bitch, bitch! Well the bitching stopped the day she looked through my window. I don’t remember all of the details, but she stopped nagging at me all of a sudden. Whatever it was she saw through my window must have set her straight. There was so much blood. I had to move because of the blood.
“More medication? No, I’m fine thank you. Do you have any raisins?” They’re very nice here, always checking if my meds are OK. I have a medical condition. Kind of embarrassing, in a way. Apparently I need medications to be able to see clearly through my window. When I don’t get enough, the window seems too dirty to see through. When I get too much, I don’t go too close to my window, I might fall out onto the street.
“What do you mean, was the woman I saw running down the street my wife?” Some of the questions these people ask, I just laugh. I think they think I don’t know that my wife is in Des Moines, visiting her sister. She’ll be back soon. But I must admit, it is a lot quieter since she looked through my window. It’s time for lunch. I always get hungry on electric shock day. I hope they have fish.
I see the strangest things through my window. I’m lucky to have a good window. Some of my friends don’t have a window at all and some that do, can’t see anything through them. My window looks right out onto the street. The other day I saw a three legged man riding a bicycle, or was a two legged man riding a tricycle? Whichever it was it seemed odd at the time. I called the police, but they said that they really couldn’t spare an officer to investigate, but that they would cruise the neighborhood to see if they saw anything strange. When the officer was finished taking my report something must have happened in the station, because I overheard a lot of laughter on the phone. Maybe someone tripped or something.
“No, doctor, I’m not crazy. It was a woman, totally naked, running down the street, screaming.” I’m used to this. It happens every so often. Something weird happens through my window and people think I’m nuts because I report it. Most of the time they are polite and take a report and check it out. But sometimes they get upset and try to take my window away. I just remind them that I pay rent here and that they can’t just take my stuff away. I have rights, after all.
It’s been like this for the last seventeen years. Ever since I moved here. I needed a place to stay after my wife left. She was such a nag. Bitch, bitch, bitch! Well the bitching stopped the day she looked through my window. I don’t remember all of the details, but she stopped nagging at me all of a sudden. Whatever it was she saw through my window must have set her straight. There was so much blood. I had to move because of the blood.
“More medication? No, I’m fine thank you. Do you have any raisins?” They’re very nice here, always checking if my meds are OK. I have a medical condition. Kind of embarrassing, in a way. Apparently I need medications to be able to see clearly through my window. When I don’t get enough, the window seems too dirty to see through. When I get too much, I don’t go too close to my window, I might fall out onto the street.
“What do you mean, was the woman I saw running down the street my wife?” Some of the questions these people ask, I just laugh. I think they think I don’t know that my wife is in Des Moines, visiting her sister. She’ll be back soon. But I must admit, it is a lot quieter since she looked through my window. It’s time for lunch. I always get hungry on electric shock day. I hope they have fish.
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